Baby Hints & Tips

Help with Anxiety before giving birth

anxiety leading up to labour (Custom)I think I sound stupid, but Im pregnant with my 5th child and am absolutely terrified of labour, due to the experience with my last born baby 18months ago. Ive had no problems with pregnancy or birth with any of them. but the last labour was unbearable & i cant stop thinking about it! Is it normal to feel like this after already having so many problemless vaginal deliveries. Scared out of my brains & im due in 22 days.

  • i have 5 kids labours i could/would do again but my 6th was the biggest bub 9lb and labour was so unbearable i wished i had a c-section. Mell
  • I feel the same way, am 34 weeks, my first birth was 11 3/4 hours with epi, drip and her skull on my spine, I was so scared of future pregnancies because of this…. my next was 2 1/2 hours no complications, then the next 4 hours no complications but here I am still scared with number four, I think its completely normal. Jamie
  • I had my 4 th 9 mths ago. My 1st at 19, 8 lb 6 mmmm it was ok hated the epidural she’s now 16 #2 9 lb water birth amazing only gas and air she’s now 13. # 3 10 lb 7 face presentation shoulder distoctia and no pain relief he is now almost 4. So was really really scared with # 4 10 lb 1 she scanned at 10.8 so doc said no way and I had a c she is now 9 mth but I was so scared threw my whole oregano about giving birth. It made it worse. But I was still saying a pain reliefs free birth until I went over the the doc said no natrul birth. Didn’t like having the c but I healed fast and am glad I did it Just because it’s your 5th doesn’t mean you don’t feel the same as it’s your first. The fear is normal and ok good luck xxxx Monique
  • I have a 7 year gap between my 2 boys with y second now only 6months old. My first labour was soooo quick I was left in shock. I gave birth and had a 35 minute labour. 7 years later I thought “well it wasn’t so bad the first time I’ll do it again” and OMG how wrong was I… NEVER again will I have another baby. I had a 13hr labour, in massive amounts of pain and was only 4cm dilated, baby’s heart rate started climbing so I was induced. I had no pain relief just had and my cervix got stuck over the front of baby’s head.. NOT NICE… I thought the second was meant to be easier then 1st…. Yea… No more babies for me Larna
  • maybe talking it through with your dr or midwife might help? Hopefully this one will be a breeze. Stephanie
  • I went into panic with my 2nd when I had him 3 months ago. I think a lot of women and men go through this panic. Whether its a second, fourth or even fifth child. We all go through the same process. Will the labour be ok? Will I need another episiotomy? What drugs will I need? Will it result in an emergency c section?. And then comes the how will I go with x amount of kids at home. Try not to dwell and stress on it. Labour unfortunately is one of the things in life we can’t control in any way. Wishing you the best of luck Stayc
  • Do you have a birth plan that’s been followed up by your health care provider? I had. Horrendous first birth and in my notes there has been a specific plan noted for what would happen during the next pregnancy to make things smoother. Including being at the hospital in the ward for the entire labour for extra monitoring pain relief being offered instead of waiting and seeing. I really think if you had a plan it would help ease your mind Alecia
  • why put yourself through that, what does your hubby think? Hopefully it’s a breeze this time, I wouldn’t be thinking of it, my 3rd was my worst Amanda
  • I agree with u. I’ve had 3 and if my 3rd labour had been my first I don’t think I would of ever had another child. I had back to back labour with no pain relief. So I feel your pain. Perhaps speak to dr if u have same issues they can prepare a plan for steps to make labour better. Karen
  • I understand where you’re coming from. My first was a 2.5hr labour, painful of course but quick and not as bad as I had expected. I thought my 2nd would be just as quick and uneventful but it was awful! I was induced, she hadn’t engaged prior to my waters breaking so I ended up losing them all quickly and had a dry birth. My daughter came out with her ear resting on her right shoulder so I had a huge circumference to push out. I knew something was wrong, the pain was excruciating. After 7 hrs I was 5cm and asked for Morpheine. 15 mins later I had given birth and only after then did it kick in! Iher birth also resulted in my having a bulged disc which I still struggle with 18 months later. I really want a 3rd but my seconds birth weighs heavily on me. I think I will have an epidural. There’s no shame in using whatever pain relief is available to you. You can be proud of your achievements. You don’t need the anxiety leading up to such a happy experience! Christy
  • My last birth ( my 3rd ) so so painful it was awful.. He was back to back and rotated at the last minute. I’ve only ever had gas and air during labour but nothing for the pushing stage.. But at 6cm I was begging for an epidural but he was coming too fast I didn’t get to have anything other then G&A.. Went from 3cm to born in 2.5 hours. I needed the G&A on highest setting to push him out it’s safe to say I won’t be going through that again.. Just prepare yourself, if you feel you need pain meds then go for it.. I believe fear makes it worse so maybe try finding some natural coping methods etc. Amie
  • due a day different to me I’ve been dreading labour as well, my last one was an emergency cs and had a horrible recovery. but as it goes every pregnancy and birth is different so one bad experience doesn’t mean every other one will be. Bec
  • I was exactly the same with my 5 th absolutely nuts. Try and remain as calm as you can. Remember your past dive ties were no problems. Take some favourite music to the hosp with you. I did none of the above ended up vomiting and with high bp in labour. Ended up with a nataraul delivery. Try and enjoy the ride. With me it was my last pregnancy and I so wish I had enjoyed it and not made myself a nervous wreck. Good luck Sheryll
  • I was soooo scared to give birth the 5th time round! My 1st was a long difficult labour # 2,3 & 4 were easy. So I’m not sure what came over me?! I ended up needing an emergency c-section, I wasn’t even allowed to go into labour. I would go through a long difficult labour 5 times over if it meant I didn’t have to have a c-section. Maybe look into some meditation, yoga, hypnotherapy… To help get yourself into a better head space. Helen
  • Consider speaking with a trusted midwife or a doula about your fears. Watch some home birth videos on YouTube for birthing inspiration. Find some birthing mantras to help you feel calm and in control during your labour. I love this one: Also, 4th babies are notoriously difficult according to my midwife (my #4 was born 13mos ago and it was a much harder labour than my previous baby) Charlene
  • I don’t think anyone looks forward to labour and giving birth. Thankfully our bodies just take over and we manage to make it through. All the best Tennille
  • My first, so scared didn’t go back for 7yrs. But my 2nd wow wasn’t bad thought ok could do it again. My 3rd it hurts! So I don’t want anymore, I’m so scared of the pain. Sorry doesn’t help . But a lady I know done a calm birthing thing, and she makes labour sound amazing. Sure it hurts but there really is a way to think about something else maybe google it? I tried relaxing and letting all tension out each contraction from head to toe (with 2nd child it work) my 3rd I just forgot about that and freaked. Natassja
  • im pregnant with my seventh and I still get a little apprehensive. But I just tell myself whats one days pain for a lifetime of joy with the result Simone
  • I was like this with my third no advice but at the end of the day, you will have to give birth in one way or another and it will hurt . It’s unavoidable. Bianca
  • I was exactly the same with my 5th child. Was absolutely petrified of the labour because the previous one went for 3 days. So unless I am also abnormal, I’d say it is very normal Victoria
  • Look into hypnobirthing. Best thing I did for my labour and did it with no pain relief at all. Jo
  • I had my first last April and my second is due in five days. I feel the same as you, and totally powerless as I may be induced if bubs doesn’t arrive before Thursday (I have gestational diabetes this time). My first baby delivery was not what I wanted – no pain relief, I was hooked up to monitors because of meconium, tv blaring in the room, husband eating etc. it was so so so painful and distressing and i could not speak because of the pain.I have spoken to multiple midwives about it, written a birth plan, packed massage oil and am starting to listen to relaxing meditation type music today so I can imagine myself in a calm state when I’m in active labour. Try to control what you can on the day and try to think positive about the labour and the amazing feeling of holding your newborn for the very first time. It will be ok Belinda
  • I had a terrible labour with my first. So bad I didn’t want another baby …. Took me 6 yrs to decide to try for another baby and I went for a caesarean second time round and for me this was a lot better . Good luck . Everything will be fine Kelly
  • you don’t sound stupid at all. my labour with my 4th was so horrendous (after 3 fine labours) that I refused to have any more. because the idea of labour scared me so. I don’t think you’re stupid, I think you’re brave. and I’m sure it will be fine. best wishes to you. Casey

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