I have a 2 and 1/2 year old and a 5 week old been having lots and lots of behavioural issues with the eldest since bubs has come along. He hits us and bites us tries to hit the baby throws biggest tantrums when he doesn’t get his own way. He used to be an awesome sleeper now we fight with him for 3+ hours to get him to stay in bed feel like constantly yelling at him and feeling terrible!! Any advice much appreciated.
- involve the eldest in looking after baby….but also remember some one on one time…..kids tend to act badly when they are feeling replaced or forgotten about. they are still young and need mom and dads time alone from baby too Astrid
- We also had battles getting our 3 year old to bed once the new baby came along. We kept the bedtime routine consistent (even though it was tempting to keep her up till she passed out!) and after a few weeks she stopped and went back to normal bedtime routine. It will get better!! My bub is now 13 weeks old and the jealously and attention seeking behaviour has stopped. Good luck.x. Naomi
- Altho my son wasn’t all that bad (he had just turned 2 when is brother came along) he still had issues and I found that if I involved him in everything to do with his brother as in helping bath him, change him, feed him etc he became a lot better. I would spend time with him while his brother was sleeping in doing things he wanted to do which would involve drawing cars, anything. And then 1 day a wk my mum would watch the baby for the day and I would take my son out for the day weather that be for a play date, play Centre, shopping etc. Things that required me to do it with him also. I did that from the time the baby was 8wks old and that made a massive difference. Everything stopped and he became himself again. Bee
- sorry I can’t help you but just wanted to say you’re not alone! I am going through the EXACT same thing with my 14 month old son. He is being a complete nightmare at the moment, ever since bub no 2 was born. He won’t stop hitting, biting, throwing toys, scratching, getting into things he knows he’s not allowed to… And he just laughs and continues it when I growl at him. I’m interested to hear what other people have to say also Brooke
- It’s tough, we went through a similar thing with my eldest when my 2nd came along. So I will share some tips I received that I found helpful. During but feeding times (when the older child might feel a bit left out) have a special box full of interesting toys for your son to play with. Rotate toys so it keeps it exciting for him. It means when but is getting attention so is he. You can also add a book so he can have some book time with you as well. Place some snacks and a water/milk near you during bubs feeding time so if your son asks for something to eat/drink it is handy and you can meet his needs Praise his good behaviour and try and overlook the negatives where possible. Ignore rather than yell, and reinforce good behaviour. Bedtimes are tough..we had the same problem and sometimes still do with my now 3 and 1/2 year old. Tell him you expect him to stay in bed until the sun comes up. Keep putting him back to bed and try not to make a big deal of it….. try not to give him attention, just put him back into bed and tell him you will see him when the sun comes up each time. Maybe try positive time outs for really bad behaviour like hitting and biting. Good luck. It’s a challenging time, but he will overcome it if you stay calm and try and be patient. Nicole
- It’s not always a problem. I have a 17month gap and my toddler has been a great big brother – has not changed his behaviour or ever tried to hurt his little sis – he adores her. Brylee
- My 3yr old loves his brother never had issues expecting 3rd when 2nd is 11 months think he will be too young to cause him to much stress Zoe
- Stay positive that things will improve if you are having a difficult time… I’m sure it’s different for all situations, but in my case – hospital visits were ok, but when I got home my toddler was horrible. Got angry at me and the baby, especially when I was holding her. Threw things at her etc & even pushed me over (completely out of character). After two weeks she became “best friends” with her baby sister (her words!) & now showers her with kisses and love.
- I just tried to focus as much attention on her as I could over the first couple of weeks. Give her lots of Cuddles etc and involve her in things like changing the babies nappy 20month difference Bianca
- My daughter was born 3 weeks before my boy turned 2. Shes now 10 weeks on Tuesday. My boy was so jealous being really naughty waking up in the night and would try to hit her while breastfeeding (he was still feeding to so he had to learn to share). But after about 3 weeks he didn’t remember any different. Now he’s very cute with her. Although he can still be a naughty testing 2 year old but he’s so well behaved when family look after him! I just try to spend time playing with him when my daughter is sleeping. Getting easier now. Whenever he asks for a cuddle I try and stop whatever I’m doing and give him that big cuddle. They aren’t little forever. Hope this helps good luck mumma! Cass
- Just so ppl don’t get scared… When I had my second boy his brother just loved him sooo much and never any jealousy so it can be completely fine! Summer
