Being a parent is hard, sure we love it but damn, it can be really hard. Particularly when you’re child is in the middle of a code red toddler tantrum.
You know, when they’re crying hysterically, screaming, kicking and just unable to be reasoned with. Chances are you’re probably on the verge of tears too. We’ve all been there.
Sydney mum of two, Lydia Gonzalez has come up with a quick, easy and free strategy to tame those toddler tantrums with heart hugs, before they escalate to exorcist level. She calls them ‘heart hugs‘, and she has been using her technique to help her four-year-old son Jackson.
‘I realised my son would work himself up, especially when tired and just couldn’t calm himself down. We would try going for a walk or doing some exercise to get all his energy out, but more often it would just transition into misbehaving and just a big tantrum when inevitably he didn’t get his way!’ she says.
Like all parents, she tried it all – time out, losing privileges to screen time, even yelling but nothing worked. This is when she tried a completely different approach, one that came natural for both mum and son.
‘I know he loves hugs, especially since his sister arrived! But a hug wouldn’t last long and I needed a way to keep him there until he calmed down.’
‘After listening to his heart racing while getting a quick hug I just asked him to listen to mine and how slow it is. He was intrigued and stopped crying immediately to try and hear it,’ Lydia says.
After sharing on a mum’s group on Facebook she has received hundreds of comments from mums praising her technique and sharing their own experiences with the heart hug.
‘This has helped so much, I feel like a better mum and try to come at any tough situations from a position of love rather than frustration. The heart hug is as much for me as it is for him.’
Thanks for the great tip Lydia! You’re nailing parenting!
Try to Tame your Toddler tantrums with heart hugs with your little person:
- Hold your little person tightly
- Speak very quietly to de-escalate the situation
- Encourage them to be quiet and listen to your heart
- Listen to their heart
- Allow the time to let them re-set
- Tantrum… averted!